Why reach is so hard, part 3

This is the third article of the series the happiness hypothesis check: search for modern truth in ancient wisdom of Jonathan Haidt. I would like to share with you my take some important concepts and contrasting ideas about happiness and love that have had impact on my own thoughts.

In part 2 I briefly described the importance of reciprocity as a social bond. I looked at five very often mind games that people play: to see moral hypocrisy, the inner lawyer, the world through rose-coloured glasses, naive realism and the myth of evil. I asked some strategies for overcoming these games to see how such as life as a game. I was talking about their impact on me.

In this article I will consider some thought-provoking concepts: the principle of progress, the adjustment principle to find the happiness formula and flow. I is contrasting also look at some interesting ideas, such as pleasure versus satisfaction, having compared and passionate love versus companionate love. I am sure you will these concepts and distinctions with your family, friends and colleagues based on your own experience to share.

The progress principle

Haidt agrees with the Buddhists and stoic, who stated that it is illusory, have luck. It comes from within, includes facilities to external things break and requires an attitude of acceptance. Haidt however claims that happiness can come also from without you even. Here is, where is the progress principle into play. For example, I had the enormous pleasure in way write my first two books. I was also happy after the completion of the project and received my first royalty-free ($ 20,000 in fact). The first feeling of pleasure lasted much longer than the second. This principle States that more joy, even if it perhaps only of short duration is from progress towards than they your goals.

The adjustment principle

Do you think that no matter what happens to you, it could fit you? Scientific research shows that people adapt, what happens to you. People make judgments about their current level of happiness based on, whether it better or worse than the State, they have to get used. In the long run, no matter what happens, they tend set point to your luck back. I, was found to be true, if I earn a six figure income as an educational author. I adapted it pretty quickly and was not particularly happy as if I earn much less was.

The happiness formula

Haidt presents the provocative idea of a formula of happiness. May be skeptical at first, like me, as that was about the idea of the quantification of luck, but me open a number of new possibilities for my life. The formula is easy to remember: luck a set point = + conditions of life + voluntary activities. Based on identical twin studies, researchers have the case for a happiness set point with reference to a person, the gene made. Haidt speaks up so to speak the "cortical Lottery" won. However, he can the idea with the proposal it can be a "potential range", instead of simply a fixed point.

The second part of the equation refers to the conditions of your life-conditions, which you can change and that, you can not. Of course, you cannot change your age or race. But you can such conditions as your level of wealth or marital status for the better or worse for that matter. External conditions to role. Irritating, for example, by reducing noise levels, reduce the commute time, which allows more control over your life, your appearance, improvement and strengthening your family and social network, you increase your luck, at least temporarily.

The third part of the equation refers to the things you do, such as meditation, exercise, to learn a new language, or a holiday. You can increase your level of happiness. I choose to at least 30 minutes six days per week and that really makes me very happy at the moment and then exercise.

Finding flow

I like that term. It refers to something you want to use intensively in order. It was first developed by the psychologist Csikszentmihalyi (pronounced "cheeks sent up me.") I have often heard sports is spokesman for basketball player "is in the zone." Players are completely immersed in the moment; You are faced with a huge challenge; You have the skills to meet it; and they are always positive feedback-the roar of enthusiastic fans. It's the same with the search flow. I have seen, if a triathlon and with my family and friends cheering me me this pleasant feeling. I have also this pleasant feeling when I write.

Contrasting ideas related to happiness

Haidt contrasts the ideas of pleasure and a satisfaction. The first is sensual and emotional and it is pretty short-lived. Think of your favorite ice cream and enjoy it while it lasts. The second is an activity that flow as something achieve, learn or leads to improve. Satisfaction (the from "authentic happiness" in my thinking) come to know your strengths, and with them to their full advantage.

Haidt make a distinction between versus have (there is also the concept of being, which is a completely different topic). Research shows that when the people less work or take longer holidays tend to, happier than people who more consume or make more money. With more money or more gadgets turn a corresponding increase in happiness. But then again, the small voice often tells many of us - my himself enthalten-, that's life all about prestige and status.

There is also a difference between passionate love and companionate love. Scientific research has shown that we all need for other people, touch and close relations. It is passionate love, which is a drug-like experience that eventually wears off. There are also companionate love, a profound affection for the people with whom we share our lives, which one day will come to an end. I have experienced, passionate and companionate love, and when I older I am more and more aware of their volatility.

Key finding

Haidt, here is a more important finding of the modern sociological research: how happy you are and how long you live with your social relations are linked. It makes intuitive sense.

Recently, I was invited to dinner by my 86-year-old friend and mentor, Sigy. His companion lady was there; his daughter, son-in-law and granddaughter came out of the city. After the meal, he got a call on Skype life in Bermuda by his son and daughter-in-law. I said to myself that life liveable, now and in the future happy moment makes them.

These ideas and contrasting ideas make me see things in new ways. I could be compared in the opposite direction to one of my regular versions running. Has nothing changed, but everything is different.

In part 4 I series which my take two terms: the adversity hypothesis and the virtue hypothesis not usually with reference to the happiness.



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